All Quotes from GTA IV

Genre: Action

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Little Jacob:

You can't shake no hands when ye fist be clenched.


War is when the young and stupid are tricked by the old and bitter into killing each other.

Elizabeta, Niko:

Elizabeta: "Everyone's a rat!"
Niko: "Not me."

Gordon Sargent, Niko:

Gordon Sargent: "So you're in, big guy? Or are we gonna have to kill ya?"
Niko Bellic: "Well, since you put it that way... I'm in."

Dimitri Rascalov:

You know, if there is one thing that I have learned, it is that we must obey the rules of the game. We can pick the game, Niko Bellic. But we cannot change the rules.


I suck at life, but I bowl like an angel.

Doctor, Niko:

Doctor: "Did they die of natural causes?"
Niko Bellic: "I suppose... A bullet in the head is as close to natural causes as anything in this city."


I see you are taking a break from romancing every animal in the zoo to abuse the generosity of your cousin.

Dimitri Rascalov, Niko:

Dimitri Rascalov: "I want to buy you a present."
Niko: "Will you wrap it up and put a pretty bow on it?"

Patrick McReary, Gracie Ancelotti:

Patrick McReary: "What do ya think of Niko, Gracie?"
Gracie Ancelotti: "Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you."
Patrick McReary: "Gracie, you're sweet."

United Liberty Paper, Niko:

United Liberty Paper: "You think I don't know that? You think I've been sitting around scratching my balls with my head up my ass?"
Niko: "I'd be impressed if you had been."

Brucie, Niko:

Brucie: "Nicky, we gotta get serious."
Niko: "All right man. If you want my advice, the only way you're going to get your balls back to normal is if you stop juicing or get implants."

Iggy Pop:

This town is startin' to make me angry; angry and alone. And broke. Man, it's expensive to live here! Time for some commercials to refill the coffers. I've got a yoga bill like a motherfucker!

Street Preacher:

Hey, hey, you gotta listen to me, you gotta hear me, are you listening? It's not real man! It's a lie, it's all lies. The government lies to us. They put robots in the drinking water, they put spies in the toilets - to watch us! You think it's a joke, the joke's on you, they're killing you! You are being harvested by a marketing machine! You're not free, you're slaves! Freedom is a lie! They use drugs to control you, they did it to me for a long time. You need love! I need you, you need me, I love you! Love me back!

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