Well done. Here are the test results: You are a horrible person. I'm serious, that's what it says: "A horrible person." We weren't even testing for that. Don't let that horrible-person thing discourage you. It's just a data point. If it makes you feel any better, science has now validated your birth mother's decision to abandon you on a doorstep.

You know, there are test subjects in Africa who don't even have monitors in their test chambers. Why don't you think of that before you break any more of them?

They're not even your screens to break! It's vandalism! It's pure vandalism! You wouldn't do this if it was your house, would you? If I came around to your house smashin' your telly, you'd be furious. And rightly so. Unbelievable.

You know, I'm not stupid. I realize you don't want to put me back in charge. You think I'll betray you. And on any other day, you'd be right. The scientists were always hanging cores on me to regulate my behavior. I've heard voices all my life. But now I hear the voice of a conscience, and it's terrifying... because for the first time it's my voice! I'm being serious. I think there's something really wrong with me!

For this next test, we put nanoparticles in the gel. In layman's terms, that's a billion little gizmos that are going to travel into your bloodstream and pump experimental genes and RNA molecules and so forth into your tumors. Now, maybe you don't have any tumors. Well, don't worry. If you sat on a folding chair in the lobby and weren't wearing lead underpants, we took care of that too.