This is your fault. I'm going to kill you. And all the cake is gone. You don't even care, do you?

As part of a required Enrichment Center protocol, the previous statement that we would not monitor the test area was a complete fabrication. We will stop enhancing the truth in three... two... zzzt

The Enrichment Center is required to remind you that the Weighted Companion Cube cannot talk. In the event that it does talk The Enrichment Centre asks you to ignore its advice.

Area and state regulations do not allow the Companion Cube to remain here, alone and companionless.

Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between portals. In layman's terms, speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out.