The boys have prepared everything and found me a lamb. Blood will course through the fiberoptics, swirling and blending with the digital, opening the gates of the abyss. Death within arm's reach, the metallic taste of his scythe on my tongue, I will tug at the tangled cables of Fate. A hard reset, a blue screen, a brain reformatted... I'm ready. Luck be with me.

If planting bombs net enough, what can you do? You become bomb.

Would you rather live in peace as Mr. Nobody, die ripe, old and smellin' slightly of urine? Or go down for all times in a glaze of glory, smellin' near like posies, 'thout seein' your thirtieth?

The wind whistling through boarded-up windows. Tumbleweeds scratching across dry, sandy tracks. That's how towns die. Not with a bang, but with whispers and whimpers.

Just when we thought Macroware was done putting out unfinished games, we get this piping hot plate of spaghetti code. Frankly, I don't even know where to start. From the "story mode" which feels like it was cobbled together from the half-baked ideas of six writers working in different time zones, to the non-intuitive tutorials, to the ridiculous lag that had me up making a fresh cup of coffee between each punch, and finally to the head-scratching localization foul-ups. (Honestly, the dialogues make no sense in any language. What the hell were they originally written in? Swiss?)