During the Great Depression, the Tennessee Valley Authority outlawed pet rabbits, forcing many to hot glue-gun long ears onto their pet mice.

If the Enrichment Center is currently being bombarded with fireballs, meteorites, or other objects from space, please avoid unsheltered testing areas wherever a lack of shelter from space-debris DOES NOT appear to be a deliberate part of the test.

Announcer: Good Morning! You have been in suspension for nine, nine, nine, nine, nine nine...
Wheatley: Hello?
Announcer: This courtesy call is to inform all test subjects to vacate the Enrichment Center.
Wheatley: Are you going to open this door? Because it's fairly urgent.

To clarify, I was being a bit facetious about wanting to get rid of monitors. They're actually really quite useful. So I do want them around. So if you could avoid smashing them.

If you feel liquid running down your neck, relax, lie on your back, and apply immediate pressure to your temples. You are simply experiencing a rare reaction in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head.