Also, I might have... umm... sort of... plowed his daughter. A little.

Nobody's dick is that long, not even Long Dick Johnson, and he had a fucking long dick. Thus, the name.

<Excited Beeping>

Truth is, the game was rigged from the start.

Commie ghosts what don't know they're dead. Hoping to steal our rockets so they can fly up and paint the moon pink and draw a Lenin face on it.