Let's be honest. Neither one of us knows what that thing does. Just put it in the corner and I'll deal with it later.

Area and state regulations do not allow the Companion Cube to remain here, alone and companionless.

We are pleased that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we were going to murder you. We are very very happy for your success. We are throwing a party in honor of your tremendous success. Place the device on the ground, then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides. A party associate will arrive shortly to collect you for your party. Make no further attempt to leave the testing area. Assume the Party Escort Submission Position, or you will miss the party.

The Enrichment Center promises to always provide a safe testing environment. In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice. For instance: the floor here will kill you. Try to avoid it.

Who are you? What is that? Oh, What's that? What's THAT? What is THAT?