Brucie: Nicky, we gotta get serious.
Niko: All right man. If you want my advice, the only way you're going to get your balls back to normal is if you stop juicing or get implants.

Gordon Sargent: So you're in, big guy? Or are we gonna have to kill ya?
Niko Bellic: Well, since you put it that way... I'm in.

Dimitri Rascalov: I want to buy you a present.
Niko: Will you wrap it up and put a pretty bow on it?

I have been to the other side. I have been there and it's incredible. They have flying elephants. They have men made out of chocolate. They have pizzas as big as the city. They have a prize for the a person with the biggest heart, not the biggest wallet.

You can't shake no hands when ye fist be clenched.