Steve Haines: The problem with this job is I only get to know the criminals who are dumb enough to get themselves caught.
Michael: Only I didn't get myself caught. Remember? I turned myself in.
Steve Haines: That makes you doubly dumb.

I'm rich, I'm miserable - I'm pretty average for this town.

Fuck man, you know how it is, homie. You just start running and shit. Then all of a sudden your legs give in and you just can't run no more.

I am diversification personified... or personification diversified.

Maybe if you got rid of that old Yee-Yee ass haircut you got you’d get some bitches on your dick.