Michael: Well, I had to. To protect you.
Jimmy: Yeah, keep telling yourself that, when you see their faces every time you close your eyes. Here we are. The bike rental place. Please don't shoot the bike rental guy out of, like, force of habit.

Maybe if you got rid of that old Yee-Yee ass haircut you got you’d get some bitches on your dick.

I'll swing by and sign the contracts, alright? Just ignore the bodies!

Remember To Turn Off Your Cell Phones, And Please Don’t Masturbate.

They damaged my stuff. They smash up my home. Damage my soul. Look at this... This, this, this, this statue here of Impotent Rage. This fucking meant more to me than Johnny K meant to anyone! And they smashed it! Those pathetic, midlife crisis, hog-riding, shaven-headed, fruity leather-chap-wearing fucking assholes!