Carl Johnson: Oh shit! Where you get this?
Cesar: Same place I got my pants, homes. This is America, man!

You know, I gotta come up with a title for you -- a rank, maybe. Somethin' to differentiate you from the other Slabs. How about... Super-Badass? Or, no, wait... Lord of Asskickery? I dunno. Somethin'll come to me.

Cut them from this world.

Men are born, and then they're formed.

We get dirty, and the world stays clean. That's the mission.

Catalina: Are you going to fight for my love?
CJ: No. I can take rejection.

Cortana: So have you got a plan to get out?
Master Chief: I was gonna shoot my way out. Mix things up a little.

Only death awaits you all.

For this next test, we put nanoparticles in the gel. In layman's terms, that's a billion little gizmos that are going to travel into your bloodstream and pump experimental genes and RNA molecules and so forth into your tumors. Now, maybe you don't have any tumors. Well, don't worry. If you sat on a folding chair in the lobby and weren't wearing lead underpants, we took care of that too.

Announcer: Good Morning! You have been in suspension for nine, nine, nine, nine, nine nine...
Wheatley: Hello?
Announcer: This courtesy call is to inform all test subjects to vacate the Enrichment Center.
Wheatley: Are you going to open this door? Because it's fairly urgent.

Commie ghosts what don't know they're dead. Hoping to steal our rockets so they can fly up and paint the moon pink and draw a Lenin face on it.

Unlike everything else in your life, the work you do here matters!

"Yeah, see I'll tell you what the alternative is. It's not that complicated. It's about one man and this gun versus another man. Sure, civilization may be dull, but the alternative, Mr. Marston, is hell."

Weaponizing deamons. For a brighter tomorrow!

This town is startin' to make me angry; angry and alone. And broke. Man, it's expensive to live here! Time for some commercials to refill the coffers. I've got a yoga bill like a motherfucker!