Seatbelt. Serious.

Trevor: So, we ready to go on this?
Wade: Yep, although Floyd don't think it's a good idea meetin' at the condo...
Trevor: Tell Floyd it's a great idea to meet at the condo, and tell him we'll need chips and dip and prostitutes.

Michael: Come back, we'll order pizza.
Trevor: Fuck you! Fuck your pizza. Fuck everything it stands for!

Mine ain't nothin' special, but this boy gets the job done.

So Michael, this is where dead men come back to life. It's been nearly ten years. But you'll keep for another day or so huh, old friend? You motherfucking fuck! I grieved for you! You weren't even fucking dead. You were my best friend. Well guess who's coming to shit on your doorstep, you fuck!

Wade: Are we nearly there yet?
Trevor: No, Wade.
Wade: Are nearly NEARLY there?
Trevor: You keep this up, you're not gonna get there at all.

Steve Haines: Those bastards love to sell drugs.
Trevor: Who doesn't?

Did someone say yoga?

Ortega: What the fuck, Trevor?
Trevor: This is the fuck, my soggy friend! You are out of business. The Lost MC are out of business. The guns and crank in this area go through Trevor Philips Enterprise, or they ain't going!

The guns and crank in this area go through Trevor Phillips Enterprises... or they ain't going!

Fabian: Namaste.
Michael: Nama-go-fuck-yourself.

Next, I'll have this thing so far up your ass, your tonsils will be playing shadow puppets.

You make me want a lobotomy!

I'm rich, I'm miserable - I'm pretty average for this town.

You know, I've been in this game for a lot of years and I got out alive. If you want my advice - give the shit up.

What a shit show. I'll tell you what, you could take this desert, and stick it. My life may be a world of pain, but from here on out it's gonna be cool, comfortable, air-conditioned pain.

You look like you struggle with simple tasks.

Fuck man, you know how it is, homie. You just start running and shit. Then all of a sudden your legs give in and you just can't run no more.

I'll swing by and sign the contracts, alright? Just ignore the bodies!

Lamar: I'm getting my money in the hood, I'm straight, fool. I'm cool!
Franklin: You cool? Cool what? Slinging dope and throwing up gang signs?

Michael: Surviving is winning, Franklin, everything else is bullshit. Fairy tales spun by people too afraid to look life in the eye. Whatever it takes, kid: survive.
Franklin: Damn straight.

Ladies and gentlemen! This is your moment! Please don't make me ruin all the great work your plastic surgeons have been doing!

Simeon: You tell me exactly what you want, and I will very carefully explain to you why it cannot be.
Franklin: What?

Why did I move here? I guess it was the weather. Or the... Ah, I don't know, that thing. That magic. You see it in the movies. I wanted to retire. From what I was doing, you know? From that, that... line of work. Be a good guy for once, a family man. So, I bought a big house. Came here, put my feet up, and thought I'd be a dad like all the other dads. My kids, would be like the kids on TV, we play ball and sit in the sun... But well, you know how it is.

Jimmy: Hey, let's bounce.
Michael: Bounce? We're bouncing now? Is that what we're doing? Jesus fucking Christ.