Longing makes the heart grow founder, but I've always been a fan of hog-typing my lovers to make sure they can't escape.

Nobody's dick is that long, not even Long Dick Johnson, and he had a fucking long dick. Thus, the name.

You want some weapon schematics? I can show you some fucking weapon schematics! You want a superheated Saturnite Power Fist? I can hook the shit up!

Have you ever tried to indulge an all-consuming urge to kill when you don't have opposable thumbs? Or hands? Or anything other than a bread slot?

Here, take a few radiation Chems, as my little way of saying, "I'm sorry I twisted your DNA like a kitten a ball of yarn".

[Barter 40] Dr. Courier diagnoses a terminally low discussion of caps in this conversation.

[SUCCEEDED] NOT IT'S HOLDING UP AN ARRAY OF FULLY-ERRECTED HAND PENISES. IF IT TRIES TO INSERT THEM, ACTIVATE VIVISECTORS.

On a scale of one to ten, I'd say it's a "shut the fuck up and fix me".

<Excited Beeping>

Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have.

[Speech 40/50] But the girl is sick.With classic symptoms of, uh... Vagina Dentata?

Freedom is the sovereign right of every American.

I'm going to kill you SO MUCH.

They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I said I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.

Some trees flourish, others die. Some cattle grow strong, others are taken by wolves. Some men are born rich enough and dumb enough to enjoy their lives. Ain't nothing fair. You know that.

Fighting was the only thing I was ever good at, but at least I always fought for what I believed in.

This is your fault. I'm going to kill you. And all the cake is gone. You don't even care, do you?

It ain't no secret I didn't get these scars falling over in church.

The genius of the hole: No matter how long you spend climbing out, you can still fall back down in an instant.

I raised you, and loved you. I've given you weapons, taught you techniques, endowed you with knowledge. There's nothing more for me to give you. All that's left for you to take is my life.

Had to be me. Someone else might have gotten it wrong.

Just when you thought you had reached the deepest depths of horror, it suddenly got worse. How to turn off that small voice inside your head that started to whisper that you should be glad… that now, if not before, your revenge was justifiable on any conceivable moral scale. That small voice proved, beyond any doubt, that I was damned.

Life is a negotiation. We all want. We all give to get what we want.

Boss... you were right. It's not about changing the world. It's about doing our best to leave the world... the way it is. It's about respecting the will of others, and believing in your own.

They let me pick, did I ever tell you that? Choose whichever Spartan I wanted. You know me. I did my research. Watched as you became the soldier we needed you to be. Like the others, you were strong and swift and brave. A natural leader. But you had something they didn't. Something no one saw... but me. Can you guess? Luck. Was I wrong?