William: Would you consider helping me with gathering herbs for my studies?
Arthur: Why?
William: Knowledge... kindness... beauty.
Arthur: Well, I'm ignorant... ugly... and nasty.

In Louisville I met a maid,
mark well what I do say,
and she was mistress of her trade,
it was diddle-diddle-diddle all day!

I put my hand upon her toe,
mark well what I do say,
she says 'young man you're rather low',
for a diddle-diddle-diddle all day!

I put my finger on her knee,
mark well what I do say,
she says 'young man you're rather free',
for it's diddle-diddle-diddle all day!

I put my arm around her waist,
mark well what I do say,
she says 'young man you're in great haste',
for the diddle-diddle-diddle all day!

I put my hand upon her thigh,
mark well what I do say,
she says 'you're getting pretty nice',
and a diddle-diddle-diddle all day!

I put my hand upon her ass,
mark well what I do say,
she says 'let's lat down on the grass',
and diddle-diddle-diddle all day!

You're my favorite parasite.

No... ringworm's my favorite parasite, you're my second favorite parasite.

I lied... ringworn, then rats with the plague, then you.

There's a million words out there, and the man who needs to resort to "fuck this" and "fuck that" is just ignoirant or lazy.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah yourself!

Sam: Why do I keep running into locked doors?
Jones: Bad luck?
Rodriguez: You're always going the wrong way?
Hellfire: Doors hate you?
Kenny: Increased security in war zones?

Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them. We all know what Sam does.

It's not you, it's me - I have standards.

Fine, I guess I'll just stay here and eat dirt or whatever.

Like moons make swell and wane the nescient seas, so too the sky-strewn gods ordain the tidal fates of mortal days. And yet - a notion born in lonely hours - come ebb, come flow, come all that is beyond the breadth of our dominion: be a moon unto yourself. Even the waves of fate can break upon the shores of will.

You were never burdened with intelligence, but your load seems to be especially light these days.

I don't mean to judge a book by its cover, but that man is all cover and no pages.

In a thousand years, when I’ve all but forgotten how to love yet again, you’ll flit back into my heart, and I’ll weep, wondering what happened to my mad love.

I love this time of year. The dickheads start popping up.

I've taken more pleasant shits than you, Mizora.

I wanna ride you until you see stars.

You smell very delicious, but I will not bite you.

I have witnessed dar too much, and you have given me too little. Finally, I can see.

I am so much more than what you made me.

It’s been seven years since I left. It’s no paradise - but it’s home. And it’s worth saving.

YES! OH GOODNESS YES! I am a good dog… Fantastic stuff.

The alliance is reforged, mortal. The planes thus quake, and the gods shudder.

Not what will happen - what will you do. Your past is not yet lost. Your future is not yet fixed.

For I am death. And I am not the end - I am a beginning.